Archive for the ‘Non-Fiction: Gender’ Category

Self-Made Man by Norah Vincent

ISBN: 0143038702
304 pages
published in 2006.
November 22nd – December 19th.
You can buy this book at this link.

Self-Made Man is a woman’s attempt to immerse herself in the world of men. To look like one, act like one and be treated like one in her everyday life. As Ned, she joins an all-male bowling team, spends time at a monastery, takes a competitive job and even takes part in a men’s support group. Throughout this, she attempts to make insightful comments about gender roles and expectations.

I appreciate her attempt, really. I think somewhere in there is an honest effort to understand her place in the world amongst all of these other people who are trying to understand theirs. However, it unfortunately falls pretty flat. I think what stood out to me most of all was the fact that I really think she already had ideas of where she would end this experiment. She claims throughout the book that she did not, however, despite her lengthy adventure she comes out at the end with it mostly tied up into a neat little package. Even moreso than that, she doesn’t seem to have gained much by it. To her, men are either grotesque and animalistic or damaged, hurt little boys. She makes excuses for the behavior that she deems inappropriate but there seems to be this undercurrent in her writing that women are more in control, women can cope better, women, despite their struggles in society, are most of all fuller human beings. I was a bit disgusted.

I think most of all she attempted to make men fit what she wanted men to be. She studied them as though they were savage animals at a zoo and tried to make sense of their behavior as though they were sub-human. Men act this way because their relationships with their fathers are strained, men speak like this to women because they are intimidated, etc, etc. Yes, of course the dominant culture for white men of European ancestry is emotionally suppressive, maybe even emotionally crippling, but she seems to completely disregard the fact that these people she studied were more than just a cause and effect. She developed what seemed like friendly relationships with many of them, but continued to see them as subjects rather than human beings.

I think if she had really put her heart into this she would have come out at the end not with the conclusion that men and women are separate species but more like identical members of the same species that have adapted in certain ways, much like birds adapted to the sky and some to the water. As a female-to-male transsexual that has truly experienced the culture shock of living in two different words as far as gender goes in a social outlook, I promise that men and women are not as different as they seem. There are fundamental differences, yes, at least fundamental enough to make it impossible for me to live as a woman but fleeting enough that my relationships with either are capable of being just as fulfilling. It is the individual and not the gender and the responsibility and understanding they have of themselves and for their actions. I’m tired of the excuses and weak attempts at understanding that come from both sides. We must as human beings be understanding and helpful when it comes to overcoming some of the restrictions that have been placed on both men and women, but ultimately we must teach each other to understand and overcome these boundaries ourselves.

Normal by Amy Bloom

ISBN: 0743455967
160 pages
published in 2002.
October 5th – October 7th.
You can buy this book at this link.

I make a good effort to read as many books and watch as many films and such about transsexuals as possible. I like to be informed – not just about the actuality of what I and my people must go through but also what the current viewpoints relating to us are. I think everyone should be so proactive.

Normal: Transsexual CEOs, Crossdressing Cops, And Hermaphrodites With Attitude was mostly a disappointment. I feel as though she would have been better off writing an article in a magazine or something – the book is short – too short to really give the time necessary to the complicated subjects she picked to feature in her book.

The first section (MY section, if I can be so bold) is about FTMs. She treats FTMs (as with the other subjects in her book) as abnormal – something I have trouble comprehending, though I may be biased. Yes, MTFs are more sensationalized and represented in the media, but I think it’s common knowledge that FTMs exist. I do like that she touched on gay FTMs because we are a really ignored group of people sometimes (nothing like being a minority within a minority), and out of all the people she spoke about, she seemed to be the most sympathetic to us.

Her section on heterosexual cross-dressers I found a bit disturbing. She seemed incredibly critical, almost accusatory, especially when it came to the subject to the spouses of the cross-dressers. Yes, we all feel terrible for the wives of men who – gasp, shock – enjoy dressing up in traditionally female clothing. Honestly, how can they even exist with such a life? Why don’t they just hang themselves? (If you can’t sense the sarcasm here…). I realize a certain amount of sensitivity must be in place for the friends and family of people in unusual circumstances like this but her entire argument on behalf of them was incredibly sexist and made the men seem like pigs.

I think I liked her section on intersex people best, although there was a lot of insensitive language in it, I think the general idea behind it was good and should be perpetuated.

I suppose it had potential, but I just don’t seem to understand where she was going with this. I guess it’s great and all that she went out of her way to educate herself, but really, everyone should be – and books on it have been done.

The Testosterone Files by Max Wolf Valerio

ISBN: 1580051731
280 pages
published in 2006
July 19th – July 25th
You can buy this book at this link.

This book made me do a lot of thinking, which is usually a positive thing to say about a book. I cannot say much about how I feel about the author, who for all purposes, seems like a nice enough guy, but does give off this air of… well, conceit. Though, to be fair, I’m sure that’s hard to avoid when you are writing something entirely about yourself and your experiences. But, there were many things that he stated that just seemed totally out of line, especially when it comes to men and their urges and the things they can and cannot control.

I mean, I’m trans also, and I’ve been on testosterone for well over a year now and while I can agree with him on some matters of how testosterone effects your personality and other such things, I really do feel like he was trying to make it into some sort of excuse for the piggishness of some men. Maybe I’m just not ‘getting it’ because I’m gay – but please, let’s be honest, here, gay men are FAR, far from being immune to objectification. I mean, please. In some aspects I’d say we’re worse. But that’s not my point.

But! Anyway, it was really sort of just a basic tranny book. He didn’t bring up any spectacular points, though I suppose that anyone that hasn’t really been exposed to books about transsexuals before would find it very enlightening on a ton of issues. I did appreciate that, unlike most heterosexual transsexuals, he did touch on the aspect of homosexual transsexuals, which is a lot more prominent than most people would care to think. Though he himself does not fall under the homo category, he does seem perfectly respectful of it (even mentions giving it consideration during one point of his life).

I appreciate his input as another transsexual going through an experience like this in a relatively late point in his life, but at times he comes across as a bit too forceful and frankly a bit full of himself. I’m sure he’s a perfectly lovely person but, at least to me, he comes across as a bit of an authority on the subject of FTM transsexuality and frankly there was a whole lot of things that he stated that I disagree with entirely.